Maxine Pt 2

Part 2 of my attempt to make my life seem more dramatic than it really is. I think I'm really just writing to be writing. Here is the conclusion of the Maxine story.


We stood outside the Savannah Civic Center, freshly minted high school graduates. Maxine had her thug boyfriend's arm draped around her. My Brandy look a like girlfriend stood next to me, paying more attention to her friends in the school band than to me. Although events of the last year (too embarrassing to write about) had strained our relationship a little, Maxine and I found our way back to the comfortable friendship we had nurtured over the past 6 years. I had accepted that Maxine would never be my girl, even getting in (and out) of a serious (for high school) relationship. Although I still felt her, I was no longer playing myself for her.

"So what are you doing tonight?" I asked.

"The family is going to dinner and then to the party at the Masonic Lodge"

"Oh, so you just forgot to invite me" I joked.

"No, come on now. You know, everyone is gonna be there. What you need an engraved invitation or something?" she said, hitting me on the arm.

"Okay, then I'll see you there tonight. I'm gonna roll with Kareem and Tori."

"Congratulations Hoodlum! We did it!!!"

"Damn, right, Princess! High School Graduates!"

We hugged and she gave me a peck on the cheek and then we went our separate ways. I walked across the parking lot with a sense of relief. For some reason, at the time, high school felt like war. If only I knew that school was cake compared to going to work every day and paying bills.

I never did make it to the party, though. I went to dinner with the fam and I was just about to roll out to the party when my father took me aside to offer me some words of wisdom between sips of Seagrams and drags on his Newports. I got ready to leave again, and then my mother cried and held on for dear life. Then my grandmother had to pray over me. Before I knew it, it was late as hell. When my boys and I got to the party, the police had already shut it down. Something about somebody shooting off guns in the vicinity. Savannah was like that. You couldn't ever have any function without violence happening. I went through all that to say that I missed Maxine. As the summer went on, my lack of a car as well as my hanging out with "Brandy", prevented me from seeing Maxine again. Before I knew it, it was time for college, I went to Savannah State and Maxine went to Georgia Southern. It was only 45 minutes away, but I never saw her again.

Until tonight. Just by chance, Maxine, or her doppelganger, just happened to be in the same Kroger, at the same time, on the same night as me. I don't usually talk to people when I'm out, my self diagnosed social anxiety disorder stops that. But I had to know if it was her. I don't know if I really wanted it to be her, or not. I mean, what can I say that I have accomplished in the 15 years since I last saw her? Never married, no kids, not where I want to be in my career. What if it was her and she achieved her dream of becoming a lawyer while I didn't become the successful rapper or writer that she told me I could be? What if she is happily married with children while I am perpetually single, albeit mostly by choice? What if? Oh, forget the what ifs? I decided to go for it and approached her in the ice cream aisle.

"Hey, Maxine?" I inquired.

She didn't look up. Although we were the only two people in the area, she must have thought I was talking to someone else.

"Excuse me, Is your name Maxine?"

"No, I'm such and such." I forget what her name really was.

"I'm sorry. You just look like someone I went to school with. Sorry for bothering you"

"No problem. Where did you go to school?"

"In Savannah."

"Nah, I'm a Grady Baby. I'm from here."

"Okay, sorry again. Have a good night."

It wasn't Maxine. But it looked just like her.

Maxine

I happened to notice a girl in a light shade of blue
I happened to see her, the sight of her leaves me confused
She may not be you
But she looks just like you

"Maxine" John Legend

I love that song. If you haven't heard it, here's the link. In fact, when I first got the album, I listened to this song over and over. The girl in the following story's name is not Maxine, but we'll call her that to keep in the theme of the song. Besides, I learned my lesson last year using some one's real name. She found the old blog and read all about herself, so to avoid that happening we'll call her Maxine. Another real life crazy situation from Rashan's life.

I know all of you told me about hanging out at 4 in the morning, but I'm a midnight marauder. That's what I do. I can't sleep at night and I can't get up in the morning. So when I have to do stuff like go to the grocery store, chances are its gonna happen in the wee hours when most normal people are sleep. Tonight, I hit up the Kroger to replenish my chicken waings and ground turkey and almost lost my mind. I think I saw Maxine for the first time in 15 years. Matter of fact, I can tell you the last time I saw her. It was June 1992. The night of our high school graduation.

Maxine was the one. Even though she never felt me like that, I was hopelessly devoted to her. We were friends, and try as I might, I could never cross the friendship boundary. I used to get stuck in that zone a lot. I wasn't always the ruggedly handsome blogger you see now a days LOL. I was the chubby, quiet, eccentric, well lets just say what it was. I was a big nerd. Don't go feeling sorry for me, I liked who I was. I was a paradoxical figure. I could recite Big Daddy Kane lyrics one minute and in the next make a Herman Melville reference. (Bartleby the Scrivener was my shit.) But it didn't always translate well to others. I was a little off putting to some people and others just didn't know I existed. Such was high school, but Maxine got me. I mean, she was one of the few people that I consistently remained friendly with. And I carried a mean torch for her too going back to the middle school days when she had a curl and I rocked my first flat top.

Fast forward to tonight. I'm walking down the cereal aisle, looking for the Cinnamon Toast Crunch, when I passed her. We gave each other the obligatory head nod and I thought to myself "She looks like someone I know." I couldn't place it so I kept it moving. I ran into her again in the meat department. I saw her out the corner of my eye, scrunching up her nose as she looked at a package of pork chops. That's when it hit me. Oh shit, Is that Maxine? I watched that wrinkle of her nose for 6 years. And I remember being weak when she flashed that smile that revealed that dimple on her left cheek. If she would just smile, I would know if it was her.

I didn't know if it was Maxine or not. She looked the same, albeit a little heavier than high school. But that's to be expected, that was 15 years ago. I flashed back to those days when she called me the Intelligent Hoodlum and I called her my Nubian Princess. I know it sounds corny now, but again, that was 15 years ago. Maxine was the first girl that made me go stalker. Even as I finally got a real girlfriend in 11th grade, she would have been dropped in a minute if Maxine was willing. And tonight, in a bit of serendipity, maybe I saw her again, in another city, 15 years later. I had to know. Was it her?

"Hey, Maxine?" I spoke...

She may not be you, but she looks just like you...