Things I Did At Work Today

Today is Columbus Day, which may not be a big deal for you, but in the banking industry, it means that offices are closed. Well, most offices. Not mine for example... We are here... but I'm not doing a thing. Here's what I did at work today...

Clock watched.
Completed 2 USA Today Crossword puzzles
Watched TV on my computer.
Made snarky comments to other people
Clock watched some more.
Rated movies on Netflix.
Made a grocery list that I wont use
Read in depth analysis of week 6 of the NFL
Clock watched one mo gin
Listened to the greediest co workers in the world talk about food for 5 hours.
Listened to my iPod.
IM'd with my cool coworker.
Listened to a dude go through marraige counseling in the office.
Played spades.
Talked on my cell phone at my desk contrary to company policy.
Clock watched a whole bunch more.
Got paid time and a half for nothing.

I probably should have been blogging but I didn't feel like it. Plus there weren't too many updates today. Okay, I'm off to watch the clock for one more hour. I'M SO BORED!!!! Have a good day!

July 4th Likes and Dislikes

NEW POST @ 1 PM

A recap of my July 4th, in not so chronological order.


Beginning of the day. Mugging in the mirror(s) before I went out.



Like: Being invited to hang out with friends at Lak.e La.nier for a cookout.
Dislike: Not being told that we would be going to the water park first before the actual food portion of the day.





Like: Not paying to get into the water park.
Dislike: Being mad over dressed. I really need to get some shorts. What I look like walking around a water park in pants while other people are rocking shorts and bathing suits.





Like: Realizing that I no longer have a bad ash problem and that my powerful (LOL) calves would look good in shorts.
Dislike: Totally inappropriate swimwear. We aren't even gonna talk about the adults who were wearing stuff they shouldn't have worn. But can you please stop dressing your 11 year old daughter like a hoochie? Why must your kids be so hypersexualized (is that a word?) at a young age? It's just not right. Protect your daughters, please.





Like: Playing Uno while the rest of the people went on the water slide.
Dislike: Sitting in the grass, because I didn't know to bring a towel or blanket.



Okay, I have to suspend the whole Like/Dislike couplet thing. I'm not generally a complainer, but if I'm keeping it real, then I have to admit that yesterday was my time for things to get on my nerves. Most of these are gonna be dislikes, even some of the likes...




Dislike: People that argue in public. For real, does everything have to be an issue with you two. Can we all just get along?



Dislike: People that smoke in front of their kids. I saw a lady holding a little baby no older than 6 months old in one hand and a cigarette in another. I wanted to slap the Marlboro out of her hand.



Dislike: Non listening people. If I'm trying to tell you a story, I expect to at least to have your attention for the little bit of time it takes to finish. I don't be talking War and Peace or nothing. My story is short, its sweet and you'll laugh. Listen to me, you jerks! Or at the very least, don't complain that I don't tell you nothing.



Dislike: Us against them mentalities. The park ranger telling you to be careful with the grill has nothing to do with you being Black. It has to do with the fact that you are barbecuing on top of dry leaves. And no, he didn't say anything to anyone else. Maybe because nobody else is grilling so he didn't have to tell him. There is plenty of racism in the world, lets not create any extra.



Like: Online booking, DJs (cuz that's my DJ) and the phone convos I was having on the way to and fro the Lake.



Dislike: Hom.othu.ggery... I'm just saying, if you ghey, be ghey. Don't try to be a thug with it too. One of the first things I saw when I arrived at the parking lot was a group of ho.mothu.gs rubbing lotion on each other. Not cool...



Dislike: Unexpected house guests. I figured my friend would stay with me one night after we went out, but to get a call at 4:30 in the morning when I'm chilling in my bed and caking on the phone was a little disconcerting. I didn't even clean up yet. Then after I directed her to the spare bedroom, I went to turn off the lights in the living room to find her in my bed. I'm like, you are in the wrong room. I had to sleep in the couch in my own crib. (I wasn't going in the spare room cuz there might still be guinea pig remnants that the vacuum didn't capture.)



Like: Hanging out with S.enita and her friend at the Pin Ups.



Dislike: Them acting like they didn't want to be there when it was her idea to go to the club. I'm just saying, I'm good on the strip club. I just went last month. Regardless of what some people think, I'm not really the strip club king. I woulda been more than happy to stay home and be on the internet all night. Also, the public urination was a bit unladylike. Don't ask! LOL



Dislike: Being the 5th wheel with 2 couples.



Like: Not subjecting any woman I actually like to the dysfunctional relationships of my friends.



Like: Making mean and sarcastic jokes about said dysfunctionality to their faces.



Like: Firework shows...



Dislike: Fireworks shows that go on for too long. 24 minutes was too long. Trim that in half and have just the good fireworks and eliminate the lull from the not so good ones.



Dislike: Remembering that the day we are commemorating technically doesn't apply to my people because we were not independent on July 4th, 1776. My day of Independence??? November 4th!!!

Like: Role playing conversations!! You should really hear them. You would die laughing.




This picture was towards the end of the night. The Ro.c A W.ear joint had been replaced by a plain black tee. And I was taking pictures of myself while people called me weird. I also might have poured hot candle wax on my arm too.

And that was my July 4th. I hope yours was productive.

3 AM

I'm sweating... No, seriously. I'm up at my Grandma's house literally sweating at 3 in the morning. I don't know how to tell her that you don't need heat when it's 64 degrees outside. I done drank 3 gallons of water in the last 2 hours. Grandma got the ice maker that makes the crushed ice. It's lovely, but damn I'm hot. I'm sitting here watching TV on the internet with my earphones on, trying not to spontaneously combust. I would like to go outside, but Grandma done locked up and seems to wake up whenever I move towards the door. Besides, I don't know the alarm code, so I'm trapped.

On another note, I have a new pet peeve. Holiday text messages. I don't mind if its personalized, but don't send me an message you sent to everybody in the phone book. The messages started at 8 in the morning and didn't stop until after 5. Who knew I was in so many people's phone books? Some of the people reading this are the ones that sent me those messages. Here's what I need from you: When Christmas comes, I'm a need you to either personalized my text message or take me off the distribution list. Thanks in advance!

Talked to PHD yesterday (see my message to her was personalized.) Her family lives about an hour away from Savannah. We are gonna try to get up before I leave to go home so she can take me out for my birthday. If not, then I'll see her sometime later. I'm also supposed to meet Kareem and his fiance sometime tomorrow. We'll see how that goes. When I talked to him tonight he was trying to get me to come to some function that his church is having or something. I'm not real interested in that, but we'll see how it goes. I'm just playing it by ear for right now.

I was at work the other day and I wrote a post that was too crazy even for me to post. I decided not to finish it, but I should have. You guys already think I'm crazy. Here is an excerpt from that post.

You put it in your mouth with your soft hands. Everything goes in slow motion as you take it in. It's starting to look like a music video, and you are playing the Karrine Steffans role. See, you look like a vixen to me. I can't explain it, you just look so good right now as you work your jaws. And here comes your friend. I like the way that you weren't selfish and shared with her. There's enough to go around... Why don't you do that again? This time lick your lips before you put it in. Yeah, that's sexy. I see you pulling your hair back into a ponytail, don't want it to get in the way of what you are doing. That's right girl, I see you. Take that, Take that...

I don't know if I'm hungry, or horny, or just plain nuts but I just enjoyed the hell out of watching that girl eat some french fries. Or maybe it's the lack of sleep that has my brain thinking strange thoughts. Or maybe, just maybe, she really was eating those french fries in a seductive manner and I'm not crazy.

Yeah, I probably am just nuts. I'll be regretting posting that as soon as I wake up in the morning. But no matter, I feel I can be myself on the blog, insanity and all. Well, now its 5 in the morning and I should be either sleep or hitting up Best Buy for the doorbuster specials, but I choose to do neither. Let's see what else is online that I haven't seen. One more week of everyday posting, so bear with me as I do this. Have a good weekend and check back on Saturday for a new post.