Wednesday, November 19, 2008

The Best Blog Post...EVER!!!

Not really, but have you noticed that everything is the best thing ever? Or how every little occurrence is historic? Or how people make up meaningless records when writing about insignificant things. I hate that. Hyperbole gets on my nerves. As a former English major, I understand the purpose of it, but the overuse of exaggeration is so annoying. In fact it's the most annoying thing EVER!!! (see what I did there? That's hyperbole!) It's my own fault for having Yahoo!! as my homepage. Their so called news headlines are nothing but sensationalism. I just happen to like their search engine better than Google. (Since Google owns Blogger, do you think they will try to edit this post? LOL) But their news and entertainment, even their sports headlines reek of misleading, overblown headlines. I mean, really do I really care if the NFL has never had an 11-10 game? No, but even if I did, it's a stretch to call it historic. I'm sure there's never been a game that ended 300 - 2 either. Now, that would be historic. And to say that the latest James Bond movie had a record breaking box office performance... for Bond films: that is not a real record. There is no entry in the Guiness Book of Records for this category. If there was, then I'm sure that Breakin 2 would hold the record for best box office for a movie featuring a bunch of ghey looking dudes spinning on their heads while pretending to be hip hop. (See what I did there? I made up a fake record! LOL) And to say that Samuel Jackson is the biggest box office draw... EVER is patently ridiculous. Dude was barely in Star Wars. And he is in every other movie ever made. (See, more hyperbole!) How you gonna count that for his total? Stop exaggerating. When is the last time you went to see a movie because Samuel L was in it? Deep Blue Sea? Unbreakable? (Yes, I know you are gonna say Soul Man, but for the purposes of this joke, just forget about that one. LOL)

So, in conclusion... STOP WITH THE HYPERBOLE! It's not the best week ever! It's not the most historic non event ever! Those are not real statistics and records! You are getting on my nerves with all that and that's no exaggeration. You know what? If you can't beat em, join them. I'm gonna start making stuff up too. Here goes nothing...

This is the first time in my blog that I've linked to Wiki Answers! That's historic.

This post marks the 511th consecutive blog post that I've used the word "the." That's a record for bloggers named Rashan that live in the Atlanta Metro area and have a birthdate of 11/25/1974! (don't really click. I just linked right back to myself - LOL)

Ellipses are the best... form... of... punctuation...ever!

THIS IS THE BEST BLOG POST...EVER!!!