La Dolce Vita

So, I get home from work at 9 on Friday. Jameil is waiting for me after hours and hours of watching tv and using the internet. We were gonna hit up my fave old spot Eclipse Di Luna for tapas and caipirnhas, but I was actually hungry, so we decided to get something more substantial. We decided to hit up a restaurant in Atlantic Station and after perusing the menus online chose “Dolce.” I had never been there and it looked pretty cool online, so we headed there. After a couple of misadventures in parking in the garage, we arrived and found the spot. I was concerned that it would be packed as most Atlantic Station restaurants were back when I used to hang out down there. But when we got in, it was virtually empty.

The first thing I noticed was that the décor was really cool. And it was dark and romantic. I felt like I was underdressed, but the woman at the table next to us was rocking a tee-shirt, so we were cool. They had a live jazz band playing and although, I’m not really a fan of jazz (don’t shoot me) it was mellow and smooth and I dug it. Then I realized why I liked it: The band was playing contemporary music in a jazz style. Here are some of the songs they were playing:

Swagger Like Us
Chopped and Screwed
I Ain’t Mad At Cha
California Love
Flashing Lights
Lollipop
Mrs. Officer
I’m So Hood
Bust Your Windows
Green Light


Okay, now let me tell you about the annoying waitress. She sounded like a reject from that Hills show on MTV. We’ll just call her LC, cuz I don’t remember her real name. LC was waaaaaaaay too excited, talking 100 mph about everything on the menu. Jam and were like “We already know what we want” but it was hard to get a word in edgewise with her. She wanted to delineate every drink, special, appetizer and entrée. I was just looking at her like “breathe, child, breathe.” With all that speed, you woulda thought that the food would come quickly. You would be wrong. The drinks took forever, the appetizer took forever and a day and the entrée took forever, a day, and 37 minutes. Then once the food finally came, she kept checking on us like every 2.2 minutes. Give me a chance to taste my food before you ask me how it is. She was annoying, but despite that I was still digging the restaurant.

So, Jameil and I are eating. I had the Lobster Ravioli, she had some duck pasta thing that I would be doing a horrible disservice to by trying to spell. They both were really good. We’re eating and talking and texting Joy (who we met up with the next day) and listening to the Jazz band smooth out the latest hood hits, when all of a sudden I hear this:

**insert record scratching sound here**

What was that? Is there a DJ in the house now? 5 minutes later, the jazz band stops playing and the loudest, thumping-est, pulsating-est bass line you’ve heard in your life starts reverberating in the place. Okay, I’m exaggerating, but it was loud. And hood and totally killed the romantic vibe that Dolce had. If that wasn’t bad enough, some clown gets on the microphone and starts doing a radio promo.

“This is such and such from Hot 107.9. Welcome to Dolce…we about to get crunk… home of the sexiest…”

Honestly, I had no idea what he was saying. It was just a bunch of noise to me. People started milling about the restaurant, mixing and mingling like it was a club. Meanwhile, we still got food on our plates. Apparently after a certain time it becomes a club scene. It would have been nice for LC to let us know that during one of her way too frequent trips to the table. It was tres strange. How you gonna have a nice sit down Italian restaurant spot where the drinks cost $10 and has romantic lights, turn into a club? It wouldn’t have been so bad had I known and was finished with my meal, but for real, I don’t want to eat listening to Young Joc. That ain’t good for my digestion. LOL

Anyway, the vibe was killed, so we were just ready to get up out of there. I didn’t even stick around to get my Grand Marnier after dinner. I’ll know next time I go somewhere in Atlantic Station to make sure it doesn’t turn into a lounge. I guess I should have known when even the jazz band was playing hood hits what was in store for the evening. I didn’t like what they did… ALTHOUGH…. I woulda paid money to see the reaction of that older white couple that left about a half hour before the club started. That would have been comedy. I’m sure they wouldn’t have been more appalled than Jam and I.