The Roof (and everything else) Is On Fire!!!

This fire happened right across the way from my crib. This was about 5pm, and the fire trucks are still out here now at 2 in the morning. Luckily for me, the fire didn't make it all the way across the fence, but it was touch and go for a minute. I'll be back to tell the story as long as my computer doesn't melt in the middle of the night.

Things That Annoy Me part 32

I decided to start including at least one random unrelated thought before each post.

Today's Random Thought - I need to find my Fear of A Black Hat tape. If you haven't seen that movie, its a satire about the rap industry that is 10 times funnier than CB4.

Things That Annoy Me

Rosie O' Donnell - It's not just her, but its the incessant media coverage of her. She is annoying enough without having to see clips of her yelling 10 times a day, even on so called legitimate news programs. That leads me to....

Fox News Channel - Man, sometimes I just can't help myself. I know its gonna annoy me, but I have to watch it occasionally just to see what bullshit they will be talking. They are the most smug, nonobjective "journalists" I have ever seen.

Radio commercials for clubs- If I hear one more person say that their club is for the grown and sexy I might scream. And the commercials that say all ladies free before 11 and men free before 10pm. Who is going to the club that early to save a few bucks? And I'm sorry, but not every club can be the "hottest spot in the ATL." Just gets on my nerves.

Bad Parents - I was at my nephew's 5th grade graduation the other day. I was hanging outside with my baby nephew since he didn't want to keep still. I see this lady who has a 6 month old in one arm and a cigarette in her other hand. I wanted to call DFACs on her ass. I smoke, but I know better than to do it in front of the kids. That wasn't the worst thing I saw though. Another mother left her 3 year old outside with her newborn baby, while she took her 6 year old to the bathroom. (all ages approximate) I mean the little boy can't take care of himself, so how is he gonna take care of a newborn. I had to keep an eye on them because I didn't want them to get kidnapped or something, but it just really annoyed me.

Dumb Athletes - Michael Vick? I can't even talk about that. If he messes up a $100 million contract for some dog fighting, he deserves it, cuz that's just damn stupid. I'm of the opinion that most athletes should just play sports and leave the conversation for people who got their degree in something other than basket weaving. It seems like every day, I read about a professional sports star saying or doing something stupid. Just keep your mouth shut and go count your money, you rich idiots! That leads into the next one...

Rich people- They annoy me because they think being rich gives them a sense of entitlement. Or maybe just because they are rich and I'm not.

Laws named after crime victims - Amber Alert, Megan's Law, Joshua's Law... That's just annoying to me. Like they were the only people who ever were victims of a crime. And God forbid we name a law after some one who isn't blond and blue eyes. Where's Hector's Law or Raheem's Law? I'm sure the black and brown have just as many if not more crimes committed against them.

People who argue in Public - True Story. The other day I was on my break at work and one of my co workers asked to borrow my phone. I let him use and then I hear him arguing with his wife. I take a few steps away so as not to be involved in his drama and he starts walking in the same direction I am. I go even further and he follows me some more. I guess he wanted me to actually hear his argument, but I really wasn't tryna hear that shit. After the phone call, he decided to talk to me about how his wife "was fucking up" and how he had to "put her in her place." I was appalled. Leave that mess for home, man.

I 575 - I only have to be on this highway for about 3 miles to get to work, but damn if there isn't an accident or road construction every day. I don't know what it is, but those 3 miles are the longest, most annoying part of my commute to work.

Bad Rap - Man, there is so much bad rap out now a days. I mean, its like every thing is dumbed down so much, that Luke would be considered a lyrical genius now a days. The worst part about it is that I find myself knowing the words and bobbing my head to the beat. Damn catchy nursery school raps.

My Insomnia - I wish I could get to sleep before 6 am every now and then. I mean I'm not even close to be tired. Last week, I tried staying up all night and all day, in the hopes that I would be so tired that I could get to sleep earlier. Well I did fall asleep early, but then I woke up a few hours later and found myself on the same messed up sleeping schedule as before.

People from other places that talk shit about where they are - This includes New York niggaz who are always glorifying Brooklyn, but live in Atlanta. Africans who move to America and think they are better than American Black people. (Not to mention the ones who own the Taco Bell up the street and can't make a taquito or Grande Soft Taco right). And the people who move waaay out with the white people and then complain that there aren't any brothas around. I mean, if everything is so good where you come from, why are you here?

Other People's Procrastination - I'm the worlds biggest procrastinator, but I hate when other people do it. Correction, I hate when other people procrastinate and then I have to get involved. For instance, I had to help someone move today, but I didn't find out until around 5 pm. So at midnight, we finally finished packing up the Uhaul. I wasn't doing anything, but you know if I was, someone would have been disappointed.

And finally... I am really annoyed when people are intentionally cryptic. I mean, you don't have to tell all your business, I'm not asking that. All I need is just some background information so that what you are saying makes a little sense. Or maybe I can evaluate the situation with a little more insight. And yes, you this is in reference to our conversation Sunday night. Wait a minute... I was just cryptic my damn self. LOL.

Okay, so that's enough of the things that annoy me. I'm sure I could make this a weekly feature and not run out of annoying stuff. But for now, I'm gonna try to fight my aforementioned insomnia, and get that damn "Wipe Me Down" song outta my head. "Shoulders..chest...pants...shoes" Damn, there it goes again... Anyway, feel free to let me know what annoys you in the comments section, even if it's me.

Robin Thicke's Wife is Fine...

The title? Just a random thought after seeing her in Deja Vu last night. Nothing to do with the post, just an observation...

I tried... I really tried to break out of my anti social behavior this weekend. It started off tenuously, but ended okay. What had happened was...

Friday - I had made plans to hang out with some friends at Fox Sports Grill Friday night. We were going have some drinks and stuff. It would be a nice change of pace and plus we know one of the bartenders there so the plan was to get some free or discounted drinks. As always, I didn't know who else would be there but I was committed to get out of the house so I don't have to write any more depressing ass posts like the other day. I figured we would go at night, so I ran my errands all day. Then I get a text message changing the plans. The ex co workers decided to go to Dave and Buster's for Happy Hour. By the time I actually checked my phone it was too late to drive across town in rush hour traffic to meet them so I chilled out figuring it to be another one of those do nothing Friday nights.

My phone rang again around 10. A current co worker called and said they were hitting up a strip club and wanted to know if I wanted to go. I reluctantly remembered my own words and decided that I would join them. Luckily, they wanted to go to Pin Ups, which is about 7 minutes away, so I met them up there around midnight. It was a cool scene, once we actually got inside. For some reason, they decided to hold the line like the club was packed, which I saw it wasn't when I got inside. I had never hung out with this guy from work, so I didn't really know what to expect. I hoped he wouldn't act a fool in the club, but he maintained all right and even followed most of my Strip Club Commandments. Side note: I don't understand why dudes go to the strip club to play pool all night. There were these two cats who swore they were playing for the Billiard's championship. Calling shots and trying to make me watch them play. Um, there's naked chicks around, I don't care if you about to sink the 8ball. Anyway, I made it out of there without spending too much loot with the exception of the overpriced beers and without falling in love with a stripper with the exception of Karisma (yes that's how she spelled it according to her strategically placed tattoo.) Mission accomplished, I went out on a Friday night and had some fun.

I had to work Saturday night, so no haps on the going out mission, but I did get a text telling me about a cookout on Sunday. I almost didn't go, but then again, I thought about my last post and sucked it up. I knew it would be fun, I just didn't feel like driving all the way up I 575 on a day I didn't have to work. Shit, I filled up my tank with some $3.09 a gallon gas, and wasn't trying to burn through it just yet. Well, since I didn't make it to hang out with them on Friday, I figured I would go out there on Sunday. They told me to be there at 2:00 which in CP time means 2:30 which in Rashan time means 3:00. So at about 3:15, I show up at my friends house ready fully expecting them to chastise me for my tardiness. But they weren't even home. They pulled up right behind me. We hopped in K's car and after a few stops wound up at Lake Alatoona. You know me, I had to count the number of other black people around besides us and there was exactly 1. As for our cookout party, we were mad multi cultural. We had black, white, mixed, and Mexicans there. They put the food on the grill and we just chilled out, or rather burned up as it was almost 90 degrees out there. Some of the people there decided to try to fish in the lake, but nobody caught anything. I for one didn't try it, because there ain't no way in hell, I was going to touch the bait. After a few hours and a few beers, we called it a day and I headed home.

There was my weekend. I went out twice in three days. That's progress right? Maybe next weekend, I'll do it again. Perhaps, I can go somewhere where I can actually meet some eligible women. I mean, there were mad women at the strip club (besides the dancers), but that's not exactly where I want to pick up chicks. Might wake up one day and she tells me she's really into women. And as far as the cookout, it's just like every other time I hang out with these people: there's never any unattached girls there. We'll just have to see how it goes next time. Memorial Day, GZA from WuTang is coming and then there's the Jazz Festival in Piedmont Park, and all kinds of stuff going on. Here's hoping I still have the motivation to go out. Well, it's now 6:45 in the morning. Time to grab a couple hours of sleep before work. Be easy!

The (Fairly) Young and The Restless

Warning: This is one of those complaining self deprecating posts. The kind that's going to make you say "Get over it!" I know because I found myself telling myself the same thing as I was writing it.

I'm bored, y'all. I mean really, really bored. I feel like my life is in a holding pattern. I'm a 747 circling the airport waiting for clearance to land. It seems that every week is the same thing. Go to work, come home and repeat. Even on my off days, I rarely do anything of consequence. I know that I'm never going to be a social butterfly, but it would be nice to every once in a while have drinks with some friends or something. I can't seem to motivate myself to do that though. It's my fault, I know. I have people that would love for me to hang out with them, but I always seem to blow them off. I spent some time recently trying to come up with a game plan to stop being a recluse. But as they say the best laid plans...

I pride myself on being pretty self aware. But the thing that I don't understand about myself is this: when I go out, I have lots of fun. So why don't I do it more often? Try as I might, I can't seem to come up with a legitimate answer to that one. Is it Social Anxiety Disorder, which I have self diagnosed myself with? Doubtful, because its not like I don't know the people I would be hanging out with. Is it laziness? Not really, because its not like I'm staying home just for the sleep. I'm up at all hours of the night and morning anyway. What is it? I'm still working on that. My latest theory is that I'm just fucking selfish. I want what I want when I want it. (Love Jones 1997) I think that if people were On Demand, like my Comcast cable, I would be okay with it. It would be cool if I could just call someone up and say lets go hang out at Atlantic Station one day, and then not talk to them again until I'm ready to go out again. But I know that's not realistic. It would be cool if I could make people do what I want to do, without having to accommodate their preferences and tastes. Again, not very realistic.

Another problem I have is over analyzing situations. I talk myself out of going out sometimes. I don't know why, but it happens often. I'll give you an example. Last month, I missed both the Nas and De La Soul concerts that I was going to go to. In both instances, I was all excited about the prospects of attending the concert, but then found some inane reason for not going. It doesn't make sense, really. It's not only nighttime maneuvers that I put off. Little simple shit like going to see Spiderman, or getting a new CD player for my car, or updating my resume gets put to the side for no good reason. I really need to work on this. Cuz at 6 in the morning, when its quiet and nothing's on TV, I think about this stuff and get frustrated with my own self and then you have to read my whiny posts.

I don't have the answer to this problem yet. I just know that I'm getting restless. I don't want to spend Friday nights alone watching DVD's or surfing the internet all the time. I want to get out every once in a while and meet new people, or reconnect with old people. I'd like to be the one to initiate an interaction every once in a while. I guess I just have to do it. Like I said in the preface, I need to get over it. Nothing left to do now, but to do it. Wish me luck! Or better yet, wish me a fine, bold Gabrielle Union look-alike that won't take no for an answer. I bet I'll get out of the house then. Anyway, have a wonderful weekend, and I'll get at cha next week.

Prodigal Pt 3

I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS LAST THURSDAY WHEN I WROTE IT, BUT APPARENTLY I JUST SAVED IT.

Something about Savannah makes me feel like a child again. I already told you how I was at Grandma's house. Well, Friday morning, my mother wakes me up and tells me that I have an appointment with the eye doctor. Yeah, a grown man whose mother makes his doctor's appointment. It was just as well. I had been putting off going to the eye doctor for a couple years. I've been wearing the same pair of contacts for the last year. It's so bad that it's a running gag with some of my co workers. This girl at the job calls me "dirty contacts." Anyway, I wasn't really feeling getting up in the morning so I changed the appointment to the afternoon and just hung out with my mom and her husband for awhile. I knew when I got to the doctor I was in for a lecture. She's a friend of my mother's who I've been going to for almost 20 years. Except in the 7 years since I left Savannah, I probably gotten my eyes checked twice. Long story short: I got my lecture and got some new contacts and even ordered some glasses. Here I am trying on a pair.

I left Dr. Brown's office and went to see my grandmother again. This time I decided to take the scenic route. I drove past some of my old stomping grounds: DeRenne Middle School, which is now an adult education school; Frozen Paradise, the club I used to go to every Thursday and Saturday; New York Avenue, where I had a crappy one bedroom duplex and where I first shacked up with the ex. Yamacraw Village, where I almost got shot; that gas station on Montgomery where I almost got shot, and all the places in between where I was drunk or high, partied or hooked up with loose women (j/k). I found myself getting nostalgic for Savannah. I remembered that for a time, this was home.

I had some bad times there, but I finally remembered the good times too. Like the Orange Crush parties on the beach, or my years at Savannah State, or just hanging out with a girlfriend or my homeboys. Savannah wasn't all bad. I thought about some of the people I left behind and wondered what they were up to. Where the hell is Boo Trotter? We were as close as could be for a while. How is Kareem really doing now that he is out of jail? That's my brother from another mother. Is Tori staying out of trouble? Is he still pursuing the music thing? What about Charis, Latarsha, Senita, Tiffany, Kelsey, Lorenzo, Nicole? Where are they now? What about the high school cats like Reggie, Chavon, and Billy? Are they all still alive? The curiosity got to me for about 30 minutes.

I say 30 minutes because that's about how long it took me to drive around the city. Before I knew it, I had seen everything I wanted to see and was back over my grandmother's house. Savannah is too small for me. It takes me more than a half hour to get to work each day and I had relived 12 years of Savannah in that amount of time. After hanging out at my grandmother's house for awhile, I went back to mom's to give her another Nate break. Before I knew it, it was 11 o'clock and everyone was sleep except for me. I had nothing else to do since I saw all of Savannah earlier that afternoon, so I just sat around and waited to get sleepy. It didn't happen. I felt the walls closing in on me, so I took a drive out to Tybee Island, intending on hanging out on the beach for awhile, but the heavy police presence sent me packing. Normally I would have just drove back to Atlanta since I like driving at night, but I promised Nate I would see him in the morning so I went back to Mom's crib and crashed for a few hours before getting up to go home in the morning.

So there was my Savannah trip. Like so much of my life these days, it was pretty uneventful with just enough drama mixed in to keep me alert. I did learn something though. Savannah, although not my ideal city, is a part of my past and as long as I am blessed to have family there, part of my future. Could I ever see myself living there again? Not so much, but I do hope that I can bring myself to visit more often.

THESE PICTURES HAVE NOTHING AT ALL TO DO WITH THE POST, BUT SINCE I'M EMPTYING OUT MY CAMERA PHONE FOLDER, I MIGHT AS WELL SHARE. THE FIRST PICTURE IS THE MOHAWK THAT MY NIECE CUT FOR ME. THE SECOND IS ME AND NEPHEW TAKING A NAP. THE LAST ONE IS ME AT WORK.

Prodigal Pt 2

Lets see... Where was I? Oh yeah...

Thursday started out with an early morning wake up call. My brother/nephew/step cousin Nate woke me up at about 6:30 in the morning before he went to school. Nate is a 6 year old that my mother and her husband adopted. That makes him technically my brother. But he is really my mother's husband's daughter's son's son. In some strange family tree experiment gone wrong thing, he calls me Uncle. Confusing enough? Anyway, let's move on because my head hurts when I think too hard about the genealogy of this situation. Nate is an extremely hyper child who doesn't understand that Uncle Rashan doesn't do mornings very well. I did my best to hide it, since he was so excited to see me, I brushed off my normal morning crankiness and kicked it with Nate before school. After he left, I went back to sleep and woke up around 11:30.

I forgot to mention one thing. This was the first time I had ever slept over at my mom's house. She got re-married 10 years ago this June, and I had yet to spend the night at her crib. On those rare occasions I do go to Savannah, I always stay at my Grandma's house, since that's where I grew up and feel most comfortable. It's not intended as a slight to my mom, but I just always wind up at Grandma's house. Well, I learned one thing that my mom and grandma's homes have in common: heat. I woke up sweating on top of the covers with a ceiling fan on full blast. I took another shower and after dodging my mother's attempts to feed me, drove across town to see Grandma. As I always do when I'm in Savannah, I took the scenic route. Not that it took much time at all, but I always drive around to see if anything has changed. About the only things that I could see that was different was a new Super WalMart across from Lake Mayer and a few more buildings purchased and renovated by the Savannah College of Art and Design (Yes, I know this means nothing to people who have never been to Savannah, but bear with me.)

I arrived at my Grandmother's house and we talked for awhile. She had been making some upgrades to the house. The ugly brown shag carpet that had been in the house for as long as I could remember was replaced and the walls were freshly painted, but it still felt like home. In fact it seems like I reverted back to the pre cynical jerk Rashan and was the sweet boy that made his Grandmother proud. Maybe, I am just analyzing too much. LOL. Anyway, she was going to get her hair done, so I drove her across town to the hair salon. It felt good just hanging out with her again, and made me rethink my whole not going to Savannah edict. When she was finished, I took her back home and made my way back to my mother's house.

When I got there, Nate was waiting for me at the door. He needed someone to play with I guess. We went out in the backyard and played basketball and ran around. Nate caught frogs with his bare hands and I watched from a distance to make sure they didn't touch me. Did I ever mention that I am afraid of animals? LOL. I was trying to tire him out so my mom could get him to sleep, but that boy has boundless energy. As much as I chased him and roughhoused with him, he never got tired. I can only imagine what my mom is going through every day. I'm only 32 and after one day with Nate, and I was exhausted. After we cleaned up, we played some more with his thousands of toys until it was time for bed. I know my mother was glad to get a break and I was glad to be of some little service. Nighttime came, and I was now left without anything to do for the rest of the night. I started getting restless and thought about going out to look for some of my old partners in crime but thought better of it. Instead, I just watched The Sopranos and The Shield reruns and eventually drifted off to sleep around 4. What would Friday have in store for me?

Okay, this is getting too long again, so I'm gonna call it a night. I'll be back tomorrow with the conclusion of my Savannah trip.

Prodigal Pt 1

Last week, the prodigal son returned to Savannah, Georgia. The place that I spent the formative years of my adolescence and young adult hood. The same place I escaped from and never looked back. The place that I avoid with a passion. Moms and Grandma are still there, and with some family health issues going on down there, I decided it was time to put my contempt for Savannah aside and make an appearance. But you know it wouldn't be a Rashan post unless there was some unforeseen dramatic occurrences along the way.

THE PRODIGAL SON IN SOME OLD CAMERA PHONE PICTURES

I left Atlanta Wednesday afternoon, after catching up on some needed sleep and getting my oil changed. Everything was cool on the way there. I was listening to Prince's greatest hits, sipping on a Sprite and riding down the highway with the cruise control set to 77 mph. Next thing I know my car starts vibrating. Before I could react, I hear a thud and lose control of the car. I pulled the car over to the side of the highway, (in the middle of nowhere) and notice that I have a blown out tire. Not only is the tire gone, but the impact caused a piece of the tire well to stick out. Since I had my camera with me, I decided to take a flick.

ORIGINAL BLOWOUT

So, what's a brother to do? I changed the tire and put on my spare. No big deal, although every time an eighteen wheeler sped by, I had visions of getting pancaked on the side of the road. I took off the old tire, replaced it with the donut tire and let down the jack. That's when I noticed this: My donut was damn near flat. At this point, I just wanted to get to the next exit and buy a new tire, but that was not in the cards. I drove for about 50 feet before the spare busted. I couldn't believe it. Another example of how me and cars just don't get along. So, I'm on the side of I 16, with a blown out tire and no spare. I made some calls, (no I didn't have AAA) to find a tire store that was open in the area, but apparently, in Twiggs County, GA shops close early, because nobody answered. I then had the bright idea to walk to the nearest exit to find help. 1 mile and 10 pounds of sweat later, I made it to the exit, only to find that I truly was in the middle of nowhere and there was only a gas station and a Huddle House around. I got some numbers for tow truck companies and walked back to the car. I noticed the same Twiggs County sheriff drove by me at least 4 times and never stopped to help. I guess big black guys don't need help. Finally I got back to the car and a tow truck driver came and found me a new tire and I was off.

FLAT SPARE

By this time it was about 3 or 4 hours later, and I really considered just going back home. This was an omen; a warning not to go to Savannah. Luckily, I called my big sis and she talked some sense into me. I was going to Savannah to help my mom out, so the journey continued. I finally made it to Savannah around 11 pm. The familiar smell of paper mills and ocean animals wafted in the air as I made it to my mother's house. Even at night, the humidity was oppressive and I broke out into another sweat. I was feeling nasty from all the walking and tire changing, so I took a shower and called it a night. I was in Savannah, a tourist's dream city, but my worst nightmare. I'll tell you more about it tomorrow.

Note To Self AKA My Random Post

Sometimes when the silence becomes deafening, I have an internal dialogue with myself. I remind myself about what I need to do. Here is today's conversation.

NOTE TO SELF:

Don't forget that you have a blog. You haven't written in a week.

Gas is damn near three dollars a gallon, stop driving around aimlessly.

Just because other people think you are a pimp, doesn't make it true.

It's probably not a good idea to let your 9 year old niece shave your head. The Mohawk was not such a good look. (Y'all don't wanna see a picture of that do you?)

No matter how bored you are, don't under any circumstances make that phone call. That can only lead to disaster.

Bread, milk, eggs, cheese, etc...

Stop being lazy and do some overtime before it's not available anymore.

Find a backup NFL team to cheer for because Mike Vick is on the verge of messing up the Falcons with all his off the field problems.

Amazing follow through. See what you can do if you put your mind to it?

Suck it up and go to Savannah. Your family needs you.

If you would iron your clothes on Sunday, you wouldn't have to rush out of the house every day.

Umm...when are you going to finally get your CD player for the whip. You hate the radio, so what are you waiting for?

I thought the idea of spending $129 in the grocery store was so you would stop buying fast food. Cook once in awhile.

I know you said you weren't gonna date anybody from the job, but look at her. She is practically begging you to take her out. You can't be that blind, can you?

All work and no play makes Rashan a dull boy. All work and no play makes Rashan a dull boy. All work and no play makes Rashan a dull boy.....

Don't forget to download The Sopranos. Even though it is boring as hell, it is still entertaining.

Hip Hop without hoes is like R&B without begging. It can work, but it'll never happen. Remember to find out what Russell Simmons really said and by all means avoid this topic when you see Mom.

You should be packing for the Savannah trip right about now instead of writing this bullshit post. What? I know I was the one who said not to forget your blog, but now you're done, so get off the computer.

Oh yeah, and stop talking to yourself before people think you have lost your mind.