Thursday Thirteen: 13 Deaths That Have Affected Me

So, it's 9/11 again and everybody will be reminiscing at the massive loss of life that occurred that day. It's a sad occasion and it got me to thinking about other deaths that have affected me. Maybe its a little morbid, but death is a part of life, right? Here are 13 more deaths that have affected me personally...



1. Donny Hathaway - January 13, 1979 - I remember being a child of 4 or 5 and my parents were really sad when he died. I can't remember all the details, but I do remember that I liked his music at a young age. It was mystifying to me that a man would actually kill himself. I didn't know much about death, but I do remember wondering what he was thinking as he fell out that window.


2. The Space Shuttle Challenger January 28, 1986 - I remember this damn day like it was yesterday. It was 3 days before I moved from New York to Savannah. We were watching this in the audio visual room at Elmwood Elementary School. It was a special launch, because there was a teacher going into space for the first time. When the shuttle exploded, man there were no words. Just gasps and tears and disbelief. I remember watching over and over just hoping in vain that there was some way those astronauts could have survived.


3. Huey Newton - August 22, 1989 - This one affected me because I was just learning all about Huey. It started with those "Eyes On The Prize" documentaries and moved on to researching the Black Panther Party. I was an idealistic youngster at the time. I thought that if you were down for the struggle once, you were always down for the struggle. It was the circumstances of his death that affected me the most. It was portrayed as a drug deal gone wrong. I didn't know what to believe. On one hand, my idealism led me to think it was a CIA setup, but the realist lurking in me led me to think that a once great man had fallen. I think this was an important step in the development of my thinking and realizing that people can't be put on a pedestal, but ideas never die.


4. Peter Jones - Sometime in 1990 or 1991- This kid I went to high school with. I didn't really know him but he was playing with a gun with his homeboys and shot himself in the head. This one really affected me for two reasons: 1. He was the first cat around my age I knew that had died and 2. I dreamed about it happening the night before it happened. I wrote about it awhile back when no one was reading. This is when I stopped sleeping. I know, you don't believe me, but I promise that I had details about the shooting that there is no way I could have known.


5. Aaliyah - August 25th, 2001. I loved me some Aaliyah. I mean, I had her first CD with R. Kelly production, the second one with the Missy and Timberland production. She was just dope. And then she was promoting her new album and I was watching all the interviews and she just seemed like such a genuinely good person. I know people say that about the dead all the time, but that was the vibe I got. Anyway, I remember the day it happened. I heard it on the radio, but I had no details or anything. It wasn't really real until later that day. My homeboy Damian came over the crib. We were watching college football or something and I turned to MTV and saw the story.



6. Len Bias - June 19, 1986 - Len Bias was a basketball player that just got drafted by the Boston Celtics. He was nasty in college at the University of Maryland. He supposedly died from cocaine like 2 or 3 days after getting drafted. That shook me. I didn't know that athletes could take drugs and still function. I don't know if he was an addict or anything, but it just shook my whole perception of who took drugs. Previously, I thought it was that cat on the street that Nancy Reagan warned us about, not a regular guy. Call me naive, but I was just 11 at the time.


7. That dude that died at Sam Bower's Nightclub - July 4th, 1994. - I wrote about this one here... In addition to almost getting shot myself for being in a club I had no business being in, this was the first time I had seen someone get shot. I didn't see him take his last breath, cuz we were running, but I saw him get shot. The memory of that, as well as the bullet that breezed right by head and lodged in brick wall had me contemplative for awhile. Definitely more careful about where I hung out and with who. What you know about them mean streets of Savannah?


8. Marvin Gaye - April 1st 1984 - For real, when I heard about this on the radio, I thought it was a cruel April's Fool Joke. I was just getting into Marvin Gaye as a result of his performance at the 1983 NBA All Star game. I rummaged through my father's vinyl listening to all I could from him. And then when I heard he was dead, I couldn't believe it. At the hands of his own father no less. It was too much for my 9 year old mind to take. I understand it a lot better now, but at the time I was shocked.


9. Hurricane Katrina -August 29, 2005- I don't really need to go any further about this one. We all still remember and feel this one.


10. John Lennon - December 8, 1980 - I had no idea who John Lennon was, but the thing I remember most was the reactions when it was announced. I was at a theater. They were doing Grease. At the intermission, they announced that he was dead and you can not fathom the tears that were shed in that auditorium. All of us kids were looking like what's going on? The parents who I assume grew up on the Beatles music were all torn up. If I was one of those talking heads on a documentary I would say "it was an organic manifestation of grief. People clung to perfect strangers in an attempt to forge a connection. One rooted in our society's collective sadness." But I'm not, I was just a kid wondering why the grownups had lost their minds.


11. Shawonda - IDK 1980??? - Okay, this one I don't even know if it actually happened. I've been known to have false memories. There are certain things that I remember that when I asked my mother about it, she insists didn't happen. This may be one of those, but it affected me whether it was real or fake. There are 2 possible stories... Shawonda was riding on the school bus and had her head out of the window. She hit her head against a passing tree and was killed. In various versions of the story, she was decapitated, but I don't remember that part. The other story was that she dropped her lunch box under a parked bus. When she went to retrieve it, the bus pulled off and ran her over. This is the one that I think happened. If I recall correctly, I saw it, but that could be a repressed or false memory. Also, I may be confusing 2 different stories. Regardless, it affected me by making me extra careful on the school bus.


12. Notorious B.I.G. - March 9th, 1997 - I can't imagine that its been 11 years since he died. I was sitting at home playing video games when my sister called me and told me the news. I quickly turned to MTV and they were showing a special report. BIG was one of my favorite rappers, and was about to release a new album. It affected me in a way that Tupac's death didn't. Partially because I was not a Pac fan, but also b/c Pac's death took 7 days and I had time to process it. It was just such a shock that another talented, young Black man's promise was snuffed out by a gun.


13. My Father - January 1995 - I've told the story many times, but never as well as this one, so I'm not gonna even try. You can read that one if you need further explanation.