Nailah

I wrote another "back in the day" post yesterday, but while searching on MySpace to see if I could find yesterday's subject, I came across today's subject and decided to post this one instead. I'll keep the other one in the archives for a rainy day. I'm gonna change the names just in case I decide to get in contact with her. Inevitably, my blog will come up in conversation and I don't know how she feels about getting put out there, even though I wrote about her in the past. I could probably make this a 2 parter, but I'll try to finish it all in one (extremely) long post.

I met her back in 97 or 99. We were co workers at an insurance company in Savannah. This was back in my club/get drunk/get high/party days. We became instant friends, due to a shared up north sensibility and a affinity for getting intoxicated and having fun. Let's call her Nailah. Nailah and I would talk every day at work, which led to hanging out and clubbing together. We were true platonic friends.

Nailah had this boyfriend that I never met, but seemed to be a clown based on her descriptions. The type of guy that takes his woman for granted, and would rather hang out with his boys than with his woman. That was cool with me, because he never tripped if Nailah hung out all night with me and my people. Hell, even if he did, she would have snapped on him and put him back in his place. We used to have all night parties and spades tournaments, complete with the all the cheap liquor that our little bit of money could buy. She had a couple of friends that used to kick it with us too: The hot girl, Marcia and the cool girl, Tasha. All three of them were as different as could be, but we all got along very well.

Nailah wasn't really my type. She was cute, but oh so skinny. I mean, we used to call her Olive Oyl. I never thought about pushing up to her, even though at the time I didn't have any moral qualms about taking someone's girl from them if they were undeserving (in my eyes, of course.) We just hung out and had real talk from time to time like friends are want to do. It wasn't until she broke up with her boyfriend (for good this time) that I even briefly considered taking it there, but quickly thought better of it. She talked about how she was lonely and wanted someone to be intimate with. My dense ass didn't immediately realize she may have been talking about me. Nailah spilled it one day while sitting on my hand me down couch in my eastside garage apartment.

"I have one or two people that I'm considering."
"Word? You talking about that guy from your school?"
"Nah, I don't think I'm gonna try anything with him."
"Okay, then who?"

The first answer blew my mind.

"I kinda want to try out Marcia."

I sat up at attention. Hmmm... what she gay now? They were best friends and I never imagined that they would be that kind of friends. My horny 25 year imagination ran away with me. But before I fully develop that mental picture, she brought me back to reality.

"No, nigga. You can't watch."
"Ha Ha"
"I dont even know if I have the nerve to tell her. You better not say anything."
"Who am I gonna tell? That's your friend. You are my friend. Your secret is safe with me. Who is the other person?"
"I don't want to say anything right now. I'll tell you when the time's right."
"Is it another girl?"
"Nah, its a dude."
"Anybody I know?"
"Yeah, you know him. But I'm not gonna tell you who it is."

That was that. Nailah didn't tell me that she was talking about me and the thought didn't cross my mind. We were platonic friends, plus I was trying see if that HLA was gonna pop off. It could have happened at anytime as much as they were together. Hell, it could have went down in my bed as much as they slept over my house together, rolling on ecstacy. Hell, it could have happened that one late night when they were hugged up on each other watching a Jake Steed video on my couch. Far as I know though, it never happened.

Some time passed and I started exploring my options with the ladies. Then something strange happened. I got boo'd up real quick and started spending less and less time with Nailah. It was kinda hard for me to have her over the crib all the time like she used to be when my new girlfriend was living with me. We saw each other at work and still talked on the phone from time to time, but it wasn't like it used to be. It was regrettable, but my girl is gonna come before my friends. I probably could have communicated that a little better, but hell, I was in some head over heels stuff at the time and wasn't thinking straight. Nailah checked me on it, but I wasn't really trying to hear it. In my mind, we were still as good as friends as we always were and to prove it one day we spent the day reconnecting.

It was a scorching Savannah summer afternoon. You don't really know heat until you've been in Savannah in August, ain't that right Minerva? We rode around in her Mustang, just running errands. I remember that I went with her to the beauty supply shop, and to pay some of her bills. It wasn't anything special, just 2 friends hanging out while my girl was at work with my car. She dropped me off at my apartment and was heading to a barbeque on the Westside. Nailah asked if she could take a shower, which was not that big of a deal if you know Savannah heat. You may have to shower 3 or 4 times a day, just to stay fresh. Of course I said yes. She went in the bathroom to get clean and I chilled in the living room, watching Friday for the 357th time. I heard her calling me about 5 minutes later.

"Ruh-shan, come here a minute." This is before I started making people pronounce my name correctly.

I stood outside the door.

"What's up!"
"Can you get me my bag?"

It was sitting on my bed. I gingerly opened the door and slid the bag in.

"Hold up. Come here. I need you to get my scarf out."

I did what I was asked. I reached over the shower rod to hand her the scarf. Just then the shower curtain opened and Nailah stood there glistening under the falling water. I tried not to look, but my eyes couldn't help but take in her slim body.

"Thanks"
"No problem"

She closed the shower curtain and I started to leave.

"Just stay in here and talk to me."
"Nah, that's okay. I'm gonna go out here."
"What? Does it make you nervous that I'm in here naked? It's just skin."
"You buggin... I'll just be in the bedroom."

I sat on the bed trying to get that image out of my head. Not because I didn't like what I saw, but because I didn't think I should like what I saw, if that makes any sense. This was my friend, some things you just don't need to see on your friend, especially when you have a live in girlfriend. I sat on my bed, looking out the window, just knowing that my girl was gonna come home early from work and misinterpret this situation. Nailah came out the bathroom wrapped up in a towel like it was no big deal.

"Where's your iron?"
"You wanna think about getting dressed sometime soon?"
"I had no idea you were such a prude."
"I'm not, but my girl might come home at any minute."

That wasn't exactly true. She was gonna be at work for a couple more hours, but I wasn't trying to take no chances. Nailah ironed her clothes as I sat on the bed making small talk, and avoiding eye contact. When she was finished, she dropped the towel and stood there butt ass naked, putting lotion on.

"You know that other person I was interested in?"
"Yeah"
"It was you, but then you had to go and get a girlfriend."
"..."
"It's probably best I never told you. I didn't want to ruin our friendship, but I was curious."
"..."
"What would you have said?"
"I mean... I don't... I... can you put some clothes on please?"
"I'm not asking now. I know you all in love and shit"
"Nailah, for real. I can't concentrate like this. I'm trying not to look, but come on I'm a man"
"Aiight, son. I'll leave it alone, but I'll expect an answer one day."

She laughed, then put on her clothes and left a few minutes later. I just sat there staring at the walls, trying to figure out how I was gonna look her in her face next time I saw her. No doubt it was gonna be weird. I didn't tell my girl about what happened, but she seemed to have some kind of sixth sense about Nailah. Like whenever Nailah would call, she would "forget" to give me the message. Or if I was on the phone with Nailah, that would be the time when she "needed" me. The whole thing caused a strain on our relationship, so much so that I didn't even tell her that I was moving to Atlanta. She heard it from her friend Tasha, who was hooked up with my friend Kareem. Oops, my bad. I haven't spoken to Nailah in about 8 years.

Fast forward to tonight. Like I said, I was on MySpace on a totally unrelated mission and I came across her profile. She lives in Atlanta now too. She still looks exactly the same as she did 8 years ago. I wonder if it's way too late to rekindle a friendship. We used to be so close before the whole Full Monty show. It doesn't seem to make sense that one youthful indiscretion should prohibit us from being friends again. Then again, I'm not the same person I was then. I'm way more anti social than I used to be. I'm far more sarcastic than I was. I'm more standoffish than I was back then. Maybe she wouldn't even want to be this Rashan's friend. We'll soon find out. I decided to send her a message. I'll be sure to let you know what happens.