I Be Lying

Something's wrong with my comments. I have to hit refresh a few times before they come up. If that happens, go ahead and leave your comment please, but don't be yelling out First, because you may actually be 6th.

Random Rap Lyric That Has Nothing To Do With The Post But Is Stuck In My Head:

I'm packin weight like Nina Simone, Piano flow/It's like a Michaelangelo/ painted a portrait of Maya Angelou/And gave it to a sick poet for they antidote/If music gets you choked up this is the tree and a rope

Kanye West "Get By (Remix)"

You wanna know something about me? I be lying. Like all the time. I make stuff up constantly. Then I say it to get a reaction. Once the desired reaction is achieved, then I tell you that I be lying. You don't believe me? Ask Jameil. She knows I be lying. I've lost count of the many lies I've told and then recanted in the the last couple of weeks. Like the one where I told her I was gonna go see another blogger. Got her to believe me, then I was like, "sike (or is it psyche?)" I be lying. Or the lie I told my people at work. They were asking me where such and such was. I told them she quit. They believed me. The next minute, I told them the truth. I had no idea where the girl was. See, I be lying.

I love to lie on my blog too. I remember the first time I really told a whopper on my blog. It was this post. Had people believing me that I fell in love with some girl I just met in the club. Then I flipped it on them. That was some fun stuff. It may be wrong but I enjoy manipulating people's emotions. Dance puppet, dance! But I'm not malicious with it. I could probably drag out in perpetuity, but my intentions are never to mislead you for a long time. I just want to see how many people I can fool. I pledge to you, if I ever write a post that isn't the 100% gospel truth, you'll know it before you get to the comments. I did it here... and here... and here. Oh yeah, and here Okay, not all of these were lies, per se, but they definitely were designed to fool you. But in all of these posts, I let you know it was made up.

The problem with me lying so much is that people never know what to believe. I get that. 17 times bitten, 18 times shy. I guess because some of the stuff that happens in my life is so unbelievable, that in conjunction with my proclivity for temporary falsehoods, it makes some people think that all of my ish is made up. But for real, son? I couldn't make this stuff up. If I could, then maybe I could actually finish one of those damn novels/screenplays I've been working on my entire adult life. (Anybody else watch Family Guy? If so, remember this scene about the novel? Hilarious, but so descriptive of me.) I know I be lying, but believe me when I tell you that no matter where I go, crazy will follow me. I don't be lying about that. That's one of life's truisms. If there is crazy to be found, Rashan will find it. Someone asked me how I can even function with all the craziness surrounding me. Really, at this point, I hardly even notice it. Wait, now that's a lie. I do notice it, but it doesn't bother me. It's just expected. This is totally not what I intended to write. Let me get back on track.

The ultimate point of this post was that I be lying. Lying to myself even. I live in denial. There are lots of things that I know in my heart that I deny with my mouth. It's like if I don't speak about it, it doesn't exist. No matter how many times people try to get me to admit what I already know, I won't do it. Lying to myself is much easier than dealing with the ramifications of the truth. I've decided that I'm gonna stop that. No more self delusions for me. I'll admit to myself, just as an example, that maybe I am doing something to make people act nutty towards me. I don't know what it is, but it can't just be a coincidence. Or I'll be truthful with myself and admit that maybe I do say something to get people to form unhealthy attachments to me. Again, I don't know what it is, but that also can't be a coincidence. I don't know. I be lying so much that I don't even know what's true anymore. LOL. I'm gonna work on that.

Or not.. You know I be lying!