Halftime

Nas, why did you do it?/You know you got the mad fat fluid/when you rhyme, it's halftime.

Track 5: Halftime

I'm still posting everyday, even on Saturday and Sunday. I know alot of people don't read blogs on the weekend, so if you missed yesterdays joint, just scroll on down to the previous post.

You know how in sports at halftime, the coach will give a pep talk to inspire his team? Tonight I gave myself my own version of the halftime speech. Just reminding myself of what I need to do to be successful in a certain aspect of my life. Take a look at my split personality at work...


Coach T. Casanova: Rashan, I brought you in my office to talk to you about some things.

Rashan: Aww, coach! This isn't one of your pep talks again, is it?

Coach C: Indeed it is. Now I know you think you don't respond well to these, but I've been seeing some areas of improvement we need to focus on. Sit down, and let me holla at you for a minute.

Rashan: C'mon coach. I've been doing much better. Can't you just give me some credit for that?

Coach C: You are the team captain, and I cannot accept mediocrity from you. You have been stepping up, but your efforts have not been nearly good enough. Do I need to remind you that we are losing?

Rashan: Nah, I see that. But it ain't all my fault. I feel like I'm getting singled out.

Coach C: It is your responsibility to motivate the team. And its mine to motivate you. You might as well stop griping because you are gonna hear me out whether you like it or not.

Rashan: Okay, lets get this over with.

Coach C: What's going on with you and the ladies? I thought we talked about this before. You are getting too old to be so complacent.

Rashan: Well, see, what had happened was...

Coach C: Let me stop you there. Cuz I already know what you are going to say. I don't wanna hear that bullshit about Social Anxiety Disorder. You talked to PhD, didn't you? You didn't run from her.

Rashan: Well, you see how well that turned out. I haven't even talked to her in a while.

Coach C: Have you called her? Or are you just waiting for her to call you?

Rashan: She's just too busy. I don't wanna interrupt her studies. Getting her doctorate is very important to her. I don't wanna get in her way.

Coach C: I can respect that. But why haven't you tried to get with anyone else? I'm not saying you have to marry them, but you can at least take someone out on a date.

Rashan: C'mon, coach. You know as well as I do that I only attract crazy. Like old girl at the job. She gets mad if she even sees me talk to another female, platonic or otherwise.

Coach C: I don't accept that excuse. I will admit that you have had your share of crazies in your life. But for every crazy, there's a normal woman out there that you never got the chance to meet, because you are not applying yourself.

Rashan: But..

Coach C: But nothing! Honestly, how many women have you tried to engage in conversation over the last few months.

Rashan: Well, none. But...

Coach C: But nothing! You miss 100% of shots you never take.

Rashan: So, you gonna hit me with cliches now?

Coach C: Only when they are appropriate. You can't just wait for them to come to you. You have to put yourself out there. I've been telling you that since high school.

Rashan: It works though. They do approach me sometimes. Just not lately. I'm just in a slump, that's all.

Coach C: Ask yourself this: Of the women that have approached you, how many of them would fit into the stalker/crazy category?

Rashan: Shit, you right! Those do tend to be the most possessive, controlling ones.

Coach C: Damn right, I'm right! And I'm not telling you anything you don't already know. It's time to cut out that shy shit and be a man.

Rashan: Hold up, bruh! Don't be questioning my manhood.

Coach C: No, that's not what I'm saying at all. I am really proud of you for how you have stepped up for your family. And how you go to work every day even though you hate it. I would never say that you aren't a man, but in this aspect, you got put up some more shots. And don't just be going for the easy layups, either.

Rashan: So you saying don't call old girl from the old job? I'm saying, I could call right now and get you off my back.

Coach C: See, now you are confusing things. I'm not talking about getting easy sex. I'm talking about getting someone you can spend some time with. You know someone that you would respect and possibly build with. I know you have no way of knowing until you try, but, Rashan, you have no way of knowing until you try! Nah, mean?

Rashan: I think I do. Basically you saying that I gotta kiss some frogs and shit.

Coach C: Hell yeah!

Rashan: I feel you, coach. I really do. In fact its like your thoughts and my thoughts are the same. I've given that some thought, but I'm getting to old to just be dating.

Coach C: You gonna make me repeat myself? You will never know if she is the right one unless you take her out on some dates, get to know her, and see if you are compatible. You trying to skip the process and that won't work. It's like you're just throwing up the first open 3 pointer. You have to work within the scheme, pass the rock around, then you get the high percentage shot.

Rashan: Nice sports metaphor. I really do understand.

Coach C: Son, this whole conversation is a metaphor.

Rashan: Right, Right.

Coach C: So are you onboard? Can I count on you to get your head back in the game?

Rashan: I want to, coach. I really do. I just don't know if those moves are in my repertoire. I mean, I'm the master of the crossover. I can make the girls think I'm going one way, and then go the other, but as far as working within the offense I just don't know. Any advice?

Coach C: Oh, I see you are using metaphors now too. Nice... But let me tell you this. Your problem is will, not skill. You have to be willing to do the work. You have to be willing to not take a no so damn personally, that it causes you to foul out of the game.

Rashan: Aiight!

Coach C: You gotta apply all the lessons I have taught you, otherwise I'm just wasting my breath. We can talk about this until we are blue in the face, but unless you actually run the play, all the coaching in the world isn't gonna help you.

Rashan: So what do you want me to do?

Coach C: First of all, I need you to get up out the house. I didn't say anything last weekend when you lounged around all weekend, but again this week? That's just ridiculous. Didn't you have people who wanted you to go out with them?

Rashan: Yeah, but I just didn't feel like going anywhere.

Coach C: Do you think you are gonna meet people sitting around in your drawers? Seriously, man get up, take a shower, shave and just go out. I know you don't do clubs, but there are chill spots all over Atlanta, where you can meet like minded ladies.

Rashan: Uh-huh. Next weekend, I promise. I'm already supposed to hang out on Friday. Maybe I'll come with something for Saturday too.

Coach C: That's a start, but I need you to do something else for me.

Rashan: What's up!?!?

Coach C: Talk to people. You don't realize it, but people really are interested in you. You have a unique mindset and people respond to that. You just have to let your intellect shine. Let your wordplay shine. Shine, nigga, shine!

Rashan: That's Wu-Tang right? "No Hooks?" That joint they did with Shaq?

Coach C: Yeah, sorry about that. Sometimes I'll just bust out with rap lyrics without knowing it. But you get my point. Next weekend, I expect you to score. I'm not worried about your shooting percentage. I want you to keep shooting until you make a basket. Can you do that for me?

Rashan: Yep, I'm down. Hey, coach? Thanks for the pep talk. I actually feel much better now.

Coach C: I knew that you would. We are the same, ya know? That's how I know what you need, better than you even know it yourself. Now get out there and have a strong second half. Don't make me pull out the Hoosiers quotes on you, cuz I'll do it.

Rashan: At least it ain't Rudy. God, I hate those inspirational movies. They are just so lame.

Coach C: Hey, man whatever works! Aiight, halftime is over. Let's get back to it. Can I get Team Rashan on three?

Rashan: Dawg, its just you and me in here. That would look kinda crazy.

Coach C: Just humor me, will ya?

Rashan and Coach: 1,2,3... Team Rashan!!!

Next Up: Track 6: Memory Lane (Sittin' In Da Park)