Blind Date

This one is not a trick. There will be no surprise endings. I know I'm the man that cried wolf, but for real, no jokes this time...

I hesitated writing about this for a couple of reasons. Number one, who is actually gonna believe me after I've pulled so many tricks on you. Number two, I didn't want to put anything out there about this before I know whether or not it happens. But you know me, I can't hold anything back for too long. I've been set up on a blind date. This is the first time in my 33 years that I've done this and I'm feeling kinda apprehensive about it.

I'm supposed to go out with a friend of a friend sometime this weekend and I don't know how I feel about it. See, what had happened was (said in my best Fresh Prince imitation) I made a bet with someone. The terms were this: If I lose, she gets to set me up with her friend that she thinks is perfect for me. If I won, then she would never mention it again. Well, I lost and now I have a blind date this weekend. Here's what I know: She turns 30 later this year. Has a 4 year old son. Not married. Oh yeah, she's another doggone Aries... Someone kill me now! Here's what I don't know about her: EVERYTHING ELSE!!!

I've seen a picture, but it was one of those far away pictures where you can't really tell what the person really looks like and may possibly have been taken when she was still in high school. Am I wrong for worrying that my blind date may have an extra ear or tattoo of Tu.pac or something ludicrous that could only happen with me? I know it's not all about looks, and from what I could tell, she looked aiight, but I'm trepidatious about it. She could look like a reject from Flavor of Love or something. How I look hanging out with Sa.ap.hyri? I wish I could see a recent picture.

I also have never talked to her. I don't know how her brain works. The girl that's setting this up says she has a "quirky" sense of humor like me. But I don't know if I trust her. I don't know if you noticed, but I am an acquired taste. I'm kinda like that first shot of Patron. When you take me in, (OBSCURE REFERENCE ALERT!!!) you make that ugly face like Aa.ron Ha.ll crying in the I Miss You video, (fast forward to like 3:58) like "damn, what was that?" After a while though, I intoxicate you and you want another shot. I know I'll be on my best behavior on the date, and keep my sarcasm to a minimum, but what if she doesn't get me? Am I setting myself up for disaster?

Since I don't know her, I am at loss of what to do with her. I don't know what she likes or doesn't like. I suppose I could just do what I like, but that consists of sitting at home in my drawers reading blogs. Don't think that's appropriate date material. Since you guys love giving me advice, that I seldom if ever take, why don't you tell me what I should do? Where would be a good first date spot? I'm not just talking to the Atlanta people. I'm not looking for specific spots (although I'll take em if you got em) but just some ideas of what to do with someone you've never met, held a conversation with, or mentally undressed with your eyes. LOL.

Before you guys start thinking I'm extra crazy, I did try to get more details. But my friend is being less than forthcoming. She thinks that I would try to find something wrong with her as an excuse to get out of the blind date. Would I do that? Of course I would, but still holding back is about to accomplish the same thing. But I cant. I lost the bet, so I have to fulfill my part of the bargain. Wish me luck, or at the very least, wish me some entertaining blog posts.

Oh yeah, you won't believe what the bet was. (OBSCURE REFERENCE ALERT!!!) She said that she could do that K.id N Pla.y dance (fast forward to 2:40) where they grab a leg and jump over it. I just knew she was gonna bust her ass, but she stuck the landing like Do.mi.nique Da.wes (mmm... Do.minique Da.wes.. said in my best Ho.mer Sim.pson-drooling-over-donuts imitation. The only reason I ever watched gymnastics. LOL). Hence my blind date... I wonder what she had to do to get her to go out with me.