Dreamy RJ!

What up Jade! I'm jacking your name for this post!

You wanna know why I didn't post anything like I said I would? Dreams. Dirty, nasty confounding dreams. I kept waking up in a cold sweat like WTF just happened. Thinking the dream was real. Vivid, in 3D, with smells and tastes... My mind played tricks on me. Every time I fell back asleep, I was awakened by some strange surreal dream. I been seeing everybody talk about their dreams in blogland the last few days, so I guess its my turn...This is just one of the many from yesterday...Blog prudes may want to skip this one. LOL!

I can tell you I fell asleep at 8:15 in the morning. This dream lasted only until 8:36. How do I know the time? Because somebody called me at 8:36 in the morning. Someone who knows I don't get off work until 1 AM, someone who know I don't go to sleep before 7 AM, someone who knows I am not a very nice person when I just wake up. If they didn't interrupt this dream/nightmare I would probably have cursed them out, but instead I was thankful. Not thankful enough to pick up the phone, mind you, but thankful nonetheless.

In my dream I was taking a road trip with some guy, I think he was a blogger, but I couldn't tell you who it was. Anyway, we are driving down the highway when we stop at a gas station. At this gas station, (it was in the middle of nowhere, you know like in the movies where theres a dusty road and an isolated gas station) I'm pumping the gas into a 65 Mustang. I know it was a 65 because the license plate said "65 Mustang." LOL. How's that for symbolism? All of a sudden a tour bus pulls up and there are like 20 white people dressed in bikinis and bathing suits and there was like one token black person there. They are whooping and hollering and having a good time. My blogger buddy says "Lets follow them!" I say, "cool," So, we drive off. Only the gas nozzle was still inside the car. It breaks off from the pump and gas starts spurting everywhere. My blogger buddy pulls out one of those Zippo lighters and throws it at the gas pump. It explodes!!!

Boom! I felt the heat on my face so I squinted to protect my eyes. An old man in a cowboy hat carrying a shotgun starts shooting at us. I'm looking like WTF? The blogger dude is cracking up as we speed off on some Thelma and Louise shit. Fast forward a little bit, we catch up to the tour bus with the white people. We are at a mansion type crib, with a pool and lots of liquor. I go inside the house and chill while Blogger cat gets drunk. Inside, I'm being nosey and looking around, opening closed doors trying to see what I can see. I open one door and I see...

Hold up, I'm gonna wait to the end to tell you who it is. She tells me to come in and help her with her bathing suit. Its a black bikini and her breasts are popping out. I help her out, although I dont know how much help I could be, and she says thanks. She asks me to rub some lotion on her back, which I do. I kindly oblige and my hand "accidentally" rubs against her booty. She looks back over her shoulder and says, "if you wanted to cop a feel, all you had to do was ask." I say "May I?" (I know its corny, but that was the actual conversation in the dream. LOL) She nods seductively. We start getting close and one thing leads to another and then some oral copulation pops off and I'm such a cunning linguist.

At this point of the dream, I'm screaming to myself to stop. It was like I was watching what was happening, but I couldn't stop it. And probably, you are like why would you want to stop it... Well I'll tell you. After the "head" session, I hit it... raw dawg. And despite my own pleading within the dream, I couldn't stop myself. I knew I shouldn't be doing it, but was helpless to stop it. Then the phone rang... Phew!

What kind of man can't enjoy his own sex dream? Me, that's who! Because my partner in this dream was.... T.ila Te.quila from that show on MT.V. I don't even watch that show, why is she popping up in my dream? She is so not my type, either. I have no idea what that one was about. Is it possible to get an STD from a dream? LOL

I GOT ANOTHER ONE READY TO POST BEFORE I GO TO WORK THIS AFTERNOON. IT'S ALREADY WRITTEN, SO I PROMISE IT WILL BE UP BY 5:00.